Obscene amounts of beverages

This is my first ever Venti Starbucks drink, served up by one of the baristas in the background having a public display of affection with a co-worker. I've always thought the Venti, or "large" to the non-Starbucks indoctrinated or "extra large" to normal people or "Obscene amount of beverage" to Europeans, was just too much liquid for a human to ingest in a short period. But I'm in Vegas, it's the desert, I've been in climate controlled rooms almost since we arrived, and I just walked the mile or so from my hotel to the conference hotel and back for the 4th (!!) time today. And this last time, I wore a 13.5 lb. baby and a diaper bag, just to make it interesting and give J. a break. So to describe my current state of being as PARCHED would be like describing casinos as a little bright and noisy or the current administration as a bit unsuccessful. 'Nuff said.

Crime time in Canada

At long last, Ava's passport came a couple weeks ago and it's super cool. It's the new, fancy one with the electronic (don't call it Big Brother) stripe in it. So it seemed fitting that on the weekend before the Marting Luther King Jr. holiday, we hit the road for Canada, thus celebrating a freedom of movement and travel that was unprecedented for African Americans in King's lifetime.

I sometimes wonder how Ava's generation will view issues of race and the convoluted history of people of color in the U.S. Will it be irrelevant and her interest level much like mine in paleolithic era civilizations? Which is to say, cursory at best? Let's hope she's all, "Racism? Oh yeah, I read about that in History class. Hard to believe how backward people used to be. That's so 20 years ago."

Sidebar: what's an Emelkay Holiday and why is it worthy of shrill commercials advertising "some of the best prices of the year?" That's what one local commercial sounded like: "COME ON DOWN TO MATTRESS TOWN!!!!* THIS EMELKAY WEEKEND WE HAVE HUGE SAVINGS STOREWIDE!!! DEEP, DEEP DISCOUNTS ON THE MOST POPULAR BRANDS!!!

*not an actual store. I just made that up for effect. But there was a real store with a similarly ridiculous commercial for the Martin Luther King Jr. holiday. And they were VERY insistent, hence the caps.

Yeah, co-opting a national holiday celebrating the accomplishments of a noted civil and human rights pioneer who was assassinated for his beliefs is an appropriate way to get your January sales numbers up. What's next? The Benazir Bhutto half-yearly sale? Some retailers have no shame.

Anywho, we got a late start but wanted to have dinner at our favorite place up there, Gotham Restaurant. So I Googled it on my phone to get a phone number (forgetting that it's already in my address book. Duh.) and up pops this page alleging that "Two bodies lie dead" in front of Gotham less 17 hours earlier!! WTH?!

Since I was unfamiliar with the site, I called the restaurant to verify and get a reservation. I halfway expected to hear a recording or maybe even a somber voice, cracking with emotion on the other end of the line. Instead, a perky Canadian took my reservation for dinner and when I asked about the shooting, she said curtly, "Yes, we had a police action last evening. Will you be needing anything else? I have guests here waiting." Uh, no. Perhaps it was just an arrest of some sort that happened to go down in front of the restaurant, I thought.

We arrived around 9 p.m. and had a lovely dinner in a plush booth with Ava, who was in a fine mood, despite the late hour. We checked in to a hotel that was chintzier than it looked online, so we checked out and found another. By this point, with the clock striking 11pm, Ava's (understandable) meltdown ensued. But we soon settled in for her first hotel stay ever and some much needed rest.

The next day, we got to see the awesome view from our 14th floor room...

Me and Ava, a vision in pink.
We're looking hard for clothes in other colors as she outgrows the ones she has.

and we bundled up against the sunny but 28 degree temperatures to head to a nearby restaurant for brunch and people watching.

J. and a pensive looking Ava in the sun. She needs baby sunglasses as cool as her dad's

Later, as we pushed a stroller down Robson, we realized that all the newspaper boxes were filled with banner headlines that read: "Two Shot and Killed Outside Gotham" and "Shooting outside steak house kills 2." The shooting literally happened right where we pulled up for the valet! Some local crime figure was shot to death by hitmen as he exited his car to go into the restaurant for an engagement dinner "as his horrified fiance looked on" said one paper.

Criminy! What kind of childhood memories are we creating? Ava in 2017: "Remember that time you took me to that restaurant where they'd had a gang hit like hours earlier? Good times. Good times."

It's not all roses and sunshine

You know how most commercials and magazines show cherubic, smiling babies and give the impression that newborns are gurgling bundles of happiness? Yeah, not always. That's why I love this family self-portrait with Ava demonstrating that her lungs work really, really well. It's funny at midday. Not so much between 2 a.m. and 6 a.m.

It's a swing thing

One of my friends from college and his wife sent us a swing for the baby. They have a 16-month old and say he loved his and still tries to climb in, even though he's getting to be a bit big for it.

Unlike most kids, the car and vibrating movements and devices don't provide instant soothing for Ava. But hopefully she'll dig this. Especially during the 2 a.m.-5 a.m. period when she gets mysteriously cranky EVERY NIGHT and nothing soothes her except one of us holding her while either standing next to the bed swaying, or bouncing up and down gently on a big exercise ball. These are the things you do in hopes of getting even one more minute of sleep with a newborn in the house.

Reclining while holding or jiggling her does not work. Neither does anything that's actually comfortable for us too. Like bouncing her on our lap or stomach in bed. Or patting her gently while she lays on her side. She's not having it. This child's internal bubble level device could apparently be used to calibrate instruments because nothing besides bouncing upright or reclining at a precise 45-degree angle will do. Egads.

Which is why on most nights for the past couple weeks at our house, you could find one bleary-eyed, partially awake parent trying to keep their butt firmly on a ball and their feet firmly on the floor, while bouncing up and down with a limp, though content, baby clutched to their chest. In the dark. At 3am. Aaah, the joys of parenthood.

So my hopes were high when the swing arrived. This is the before shot, right out of the box. About an hour later, looky, looky: a cotton candy pink contraption almost guaranteed to provide hours of soothing movement for the baby and peace for us.
And here's Ava on its inaugural run.

Seems to work great, she slept in it for a bit, and my fear that it might malfunction and fling her across the room while Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star plays eerily in background was unfounded. Gold star for some swing designer toiling away in obscurity somewhere.

Unfortunately, it only kept her happy for about 4 minutes last night at 3:30 a.m. Oh well. At least she doesn't have colic.

Craigslist rocks for expectant parents

I'm well aware that the cost of raising a child in the United States these days is roughly equivalent to the GDP of some developing nations. That's why I'm approaching the accessory needs of my pending pregancy as an exercise in frugality.

No, I'm not resorting to buying bags of "irregular" onesies out of some guy's trunk or "gently used recalled toys" in the alley behind the dollar store, but I think there are ways to avoid getting sucked into the buy or die mentality that seems to permeate this particular life chapter.

It helps to keep in mind that women in developing countries, heck, some even in this country, get by without all the accoutrements some people and the retail industry would have you believe are "essential." Wipes warmer?It's nice, but the night I forgot to plug it back in, neither the baby nor her butt seemed to notice. Plus, I can't help but think of my grandparents who raised nine kids on a farm in rural Louisiana and didn't even have running water until the grandkids came along.

Last I checked, babies really only need love, attention, milk/food, water, air, diapers, a healthy environment, and a safe, comfortable place to sleep. Everything beyond that is pretty much gravy. And minus the diapers, I think that list could cover the basic needs of most people on the planet.

So I have been more than willing to troll the pages of Craigslist and Ebay looking for local parents off-loading their lightly used baby gear for a good price to a new home. Most of the stuff is only usable for 3-4 months or 20 pound ranges anyway, so unless the gear comes from a smoke- or other nastiness-infested home, I'm open to considering it.

Which is how I happened upon the sweet deal below: a barely-used bassinet from a smoke-free home for $35 right here in my city. And once we'd agreed we wanted it, the mom, cuddling their 4 month old who'd already outgrown the bassinet, said, "Um, do you need a stroller and car seat? We got new ones from our in-laws overseas that he seems to like better." "It's also better for me," said the husband. "Because I'm tall and it has adjustable handles."

So they bring out the equally pristine car seat and stroller, which had the expected wheel wear, but was otherwise in great shape.

And here we are leaving the hospital with the new addition in the car seat. Just to be sure, I checked online and it's not the subject of a recall or defect, so we're excited to have found a genuine deal online that will help us manage our baby while also being part of the reuse/recycle effort.

Googling parenthood & like father, like daughter

Google is a godsend for new parents. Especially ones like me: an only child with very little baby care experience. Every unexplained noise, body projectile or behavior is worth a query, if only to see if we're within some online norm.

One early question was "How soon to take newborn out?" We're apparently a little outside that norm, which ranged from a few days to the more common one or two months.

Um, I've got stuff to do and I would lose my mind stuck indoors with a newborn with no reprieve for 8 weeks straight.

We've been out and about a lot already and took her to dinner when she was a week old. I figured, we're both feeling up to it, the baby's getting some immunity protection from my nursing, and everyone's healthy, so let's give it a shot. Plus, we went to a nice, quiet, nearly empty restaurant w/an out of the way plush booth, not some child-filled, germatorium fast food joint, and we both did great for a first outing: I nursed without flashing anyone and she ate without having a fit. It's a good start. She's a month old now and this is a shot of her on her first international trip: Vancouver, BC.

She's been a little cranky because she doesn't sleep as well in the car seat as she does on me or her dad, so when we stopped in West Vancouver for a snack and rest, she and her dad caught some zzz. Let me tell you: the only thing that compares to sleeping with a warm baby on your chest is swapping the baby for a warm puppy. Yes, really.

--------- Moblogged from my Treo

Baby news

Yes, long overdue for an update, but baby girl Ava made it here safely by cesearean in mid-September. Despite the semi-sleepless nights that go hand in hand with a newborn, we're head over heels in love with this little being, who already cracks us up with her expressions, noises and antics. We can't wait until she's verbal.

Her breech position doesn't seem to have caused any lasting problems, other than a tendency for her to stick her legs straight out in front sometimes, instead of keeping them pulled up in the traditional fetal position. More gushing posts, pictures and a delivery blow-by-blow to follow.

---------Moblogged from my Treo